podpolia

I’ve decided I like using famous writers or historical figures for the pseudonyms of my students in these posts, so I think I’ll keep doing it. Anyway, here are some conversations I’ve overheard. (I may also go through and blockquote the quotes to make them more readable.)

Confusion on the topic at hand:

Herbert Spencer: “Don’t you have to stick them with a needle to kill them?”
Friedrich Nietzsche: ” No, you chop their heads off and watch them run around.”
Herbert Spencer: “Shrimp don’t run!“

While teaching Earth Science:

Charlotte Bronte: “What causes coastal erosion?”
Emily Bronte: “YOUR MOM!”

I was teaching French today, and it provided some good entertainment.

At the Middle School, one student (upon finding out that one of his classmates was from Kenya and spoke Swahili) became curious about the vital vocabulary of that language [Names have been changed to hide the identities of those involved]:

Francis Drake: “So, John, how do you say ‘moron’ in Kenyan?”
John Milton: “Francis Drake.”

Earlier in the day, students were speculating on the exact nature of one of their classmates. He admitted to not being human, and so the tree of life was scoured for his taxonomic match. Finally, in a moment of epiphany, a student announced:

“He’s a bipedal slime mold!”

Later in that same class, the topic of Gumby came up. I tried and tried, but couldn’t remember the name of Gumby’s friend on the show. I put it to the class:

Me: “What’s the name of Gumby’s horse?”
Elizabeth Tudor: “Oh, I have a history paper on this right here. Hold on… ok, here it is. Um… ‘The Lone Ranger.’”

(Heigh ho Gumby, away?)