Normally I wouldn’t post an email forward that I had received, but this one made me giggle profusely because I have been reading a good deal of 20th Century history lately. Also, there’s nothing you can do to stop me.
The British have reacted to the recent terrorism alerts by raising their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or
even “A Bit Cross.”
Terrorists have been recategorized from “Tiresome” to a “Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level, was during the great fire of London in 1666.
Also, the French Government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Surrender” and “Collaborate.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability.
It’s not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert.
Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”
The Germans also increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”
…it’s funny ’cause it’s true!